I am not shy to go the distance and make things from scratch either. Ice cream? done. Cheese? Yup, be it simple mozzarella or complicated Parmesan, I have done it. Churn my own butter? check. Cure my own ham? yup. Make ginger ale? oh yea. Home made pasta? come on, that’s child play. Ketchup? no problem. Name it, odds are I have done it. I am not afraid to cook in quantities either, from private 2 person dinners, to feeding more than a 100 people from a home kitchen, I am proud to claim success.

I am no chef, but I say all this to make the point, I CAN COOK.

Today however, I attempted to make some thing very simple or so I thought…. Today I attempted to make hand pulled Chinese noodles. Before the attempt, my friend and I spent a lot of time researching, studying, watching youtube videos, planning every move. We even discovered a secret required ingredient that we got sent to us all the way from China. When it comes to meals, this one took the most to prepare for, we were ready.

We started by making the dough, and things looked good. We even made progress twisting the dough, but then something went off. After almost 1 hour of kneading and attempting to pull the noodles, it was clear, there will be no hand pulled noodle dinner. A big giant fail. Problem is, we don’t know what went wrong and how to fix it, all we can do is try again. My only consolation for the time being is this video.

I cant believe it, I got beaten by a noodle. I am willing to try again, Who is in?

                          

Last week, when I was in Chicago, we went for dinner at Joe’s restaurant, Yes they do have a Chicago location, and I was looking forward to trying their crab claws. I had that for the appetizer, and it was ok. I think I had my expectations set so high because of the show. If you are in Chicago and do go to Joe’s they will make sure they will tell you a big story about their steaks. The cow ate this, the meat cut this way, aged for 28 days, blah blah blah…. We where in a large group and wouldn’t you know it. Everyone ordered the steak, each steak was priced at $40+. All but except for one person. I ordered the deep fried chicken for a grand total of $13. I did not order steak for simple reasons, I don’t really like it, don’t think much of it from a culinary point of view, especially in the US.

A plate came with 4 pieces of giant chicken. This is all for me, I asked? Oh yes sir, we don’t do things small here.

Joe's Deep Fried Chicken

That is true, they don’t do things small at Joe’s. The steaks came in a Mini (8 ounce format) a 16 ounce and a 24 ounce format. The steaks came on a plate and just like my chicken, came with nothing, giant lumps on meat on a plate.

The chicken was bland to be honest, soaking in oil. probably the worst thing I ever ate. Bobby Flay set me up for disappointment, that is the bottom line. Bobby Flay, you owe me a proper meal, you hear? Some said, Samer, you are crazy, you are at a steak house and you order chicken? My answer is simple. If you are a good restaurant, then every meal has to be good. If you cant cook it, take it off the menu. Frankly I rather eat bland chicken than steak any day.

3 days in Chicago, and 3 days with dinner at a steak house. What is the fascination with steak houses? Especially the US style steak houses? What is so special about a lump of meat on a plate? There is no culinary skill to it, anyone can cook it, even cave man figured out the medium rare with nothing on the plate. Thousands of years on culinary advancement and we are stuck on a plate with a 2 pound lump of meat!

US Style steak houses really top off my under appreciation of steak. If I am paying $50 for a lump of meat will it kill you to put a free potato in a plate, come on…. You have to order sides. Each side, enough feed a family and every steak house has the same sides, so sad. Its like Steak and Side communism. My US friends are all fascinated with one more meal item that is, well, not so great to eat, creamed spinach. 3 days, 3 steak houses, 3 orders of creamed spinach.

Don’t get it. Do you like steak? Why?

                          

But once a year, and only once a year, I do go out and pretend to chef it up, but that is only for a good cause. This year, the date is June 4th and I will play host to about 80 people in our back yard and make food for a good cause.

This year, there are 10 appetizers as follows:

Pallet Cleanser: Lemonchello
App1 Water Crest/Apple Soup
App2 BBQ Pork Ribs
App3 Brown Rice with Shroom
App4 Seaweed Edamame Toss
App5 Lamb phillo
App6 Ultimate Mix with Bacon and Green Tea vinaigrette
App7 Lobster Mouse
App8 Shrimp Tarts
App9 Beef Carpaccio
App10 Cured Trout  (not firm on it yet, it may be swapped out)

Once we are done with the apps, we will serve the main, keeping it simple this year, there are 3 items, a vegetarian cous cous,  paella and pork. Then we wrap up with dessert

Last year we raised almost 5K to cancer research, I hope to break that number this year. I have already raises 3K, so I am close

There are so many good causes in the world, the need is great. I tend to support 3 charities, one is the Cancer Relay for Life, one is The Christmas Exchange, and The United Way. In June I chef it up for cancer. You can support my cause by going to http://convio.cancer.ca/goto/sforzley

What cause do you support?